Entry #9: The Bellwether Machines

I don't know how many of you have ever bothered with that old fortune-telling machine down at Wrong Number Pizza, but I've probably walked past the thing a hundred times without giving it a thought. You know the one with the big wooden cabinet, glass window, woman with silver hair sitting inside. It's called THE SEER. Drop in a quarter and she'll tell you what your future holds. Or at least what somebody who built the thing thinks your future holds.

I've always liked Wrong Number. It's one of those places that hasn't changed much in my lifetime. Still serves those folded pizzas, too. Yum. Anyway, I've never been much of a believer in fortune telling. Like, if somebody could really predict the future, they'd have better things to do than sit in a box for twenty five cents right?

Okay, but a few weeks ago, somebody showed me a fortune they'd gotten from it.

WHAT WAS BURIED BENEATH THE CROWN STILL GROWS.

Now, maybe that doesn't mean anything to you. Maybe it doesn't mean anything at all. But anybody who's spent as much time digging into the history of Conjure Mountain as I have might understand why those words caught my attention. So naturally, I went down and tossed in a quarter.

My fortune read:

THE FIRST LIGHT WAS NOT THE LAST.

Well, that's a coincidence, I thought. Then I put in another quarter.

SOME DOORS WERE BUILT TO KEEP THE WORLD OUT. OTHERS WERE BUILT TO KEEP SOMETHING IN.

I went home with three little slips of paper in my pocket and a headache. And I started asking questions.

The machine itself is a peculiar thing. The woman inside wears a long dress, with silver hair draped over her shoulders and a pair of bright blue eyes that, I don't know about you, but they followed me around that pizza parlor lobby. Her movements are rough and obviously mechanical. She raises her hands, tilts her head, and makes a little show of studying you before a fortune drops into the tray.

It's a pretty convincing little contraption, considering how old it looks. Not particularly lifelike, mind you. Her head moves in little jerks, and one of her hands seems to get stuck halfway through its routine before it catches up with the other. But there's something oddly captivating about her.

I asked the dude behind the counter about but he didn't know shit. I mean it's been there since I was a kid, and even then it looked old. Then I asked the guy if the owner was there so I could talk to him. He came out and when I asked him about it he said it was already there when HE took over, and as long as it keeps taking quarters, he doesn't see much reason to get rid of it. Fair enough.

I asked if anyone had ever looked inside the thing. He said he had to replace a motor a few years back, but beyond that, nobody's given it much attention. What interested me most though, wasn't the woman herself, it was the fortunes. I'd always assumed these machines printed out the usual nonsense about love, money, and good luck. And some of the fortunes people showed me were exactly that. But others were considerably stranger. While I was there, a patron got a fortune that said:

A TOWN MAY DISAPPEAR WITHOUT EVER LEAVING.

And when I was talking to him, his girlfriend said she received one about a tree that "remembers what this world has forgotten". Unfortunately, she'd thrown it away, so I can't verify the exact wording. Now, you can make just about anything sound mysterious if you stare at it long enough or emphasize the right words. But I was starting to wonder who had written these things in the first place. So I inspected the cabinet for a manufacturer's stamp or plaque, and low and behold:

MANUFACTURED BY

BELLWETHER AMUSEMENTS

The Standard Wonder Company

MODEL NO. BW-071

SERIAL NO. 071-00002

COIN-OPERATED MECHANICAL NOVELTY

Never heard of them. I tried looking them up. Nothing. No company address, no advertisements, no catalog, no newspaper mentions. Not even an old telephone listing that I could find. Now, obviously this company exists (or at least it did at one time), and I realize plenty of small manufacturers disappear without leaving much of a paper trail, especially ones that dissolved before everything started finding its way onto the internet. But you'd think somebody, somewhere, would remember the company that built these things. At first I figured the machine might date back to the 60's or 70s. The cabinet, the artwork, the mechanisms - all of it looks about right for that period. I haven't found anything that establishes an exact manufacturing date, though. And as far as I could tell, Bellwether Amusements might as well have vanished off the face of the earth. Then I discovered something interesting. I finally got a hit on my internet search. It was on Reddit, of course. A post from somebody in Peril, New York, asking if anyone knew anything about an old coin-operated machine at an arcade they like to go to. Attached to the post were several photographs.

The machine was called THE IMPOSTOR.

It featured a man in a dark trench coat and hat, sitting behind glass with his face almost completely hidden in shadow. According to the person who posted it, the machine dispensed little cards containing strange, cryptic advice. And dudes, when I tell you the cabinet is the same shape, same construction, same coin slot, and collection tray...

The paint job was different and there was a different character, but its unmistakably the same design as the fortune teller at Wrong Number Pizza. And then I noticed the last photograph which showed a close up of the manufacturer's plate.

MANUFACTURED BY

BELLWETHER AMUSEMENTS

The Standard Wonder Company

MODEL NO. BW-071

SERIAL NO. 071-00005

COIN-OPERATED MECHANICAL NOVELTY

I nearly fell out of my chair.

Because I'd already written down the numbers from the machine here in Burdale.

MODEL NO. BW-071

SERIAL NO. 071-00002

Now, I'm no expert on manufacturing, but if those numbers mean what I think they mean, the fortune teller at Wrong Number Pizza might be the second machine Bellwether ever produced. And if that's the case, then the one in Peril is the fifth.

Of course, that's assuming the numbers are sequential. I have no way of knowing that for certain. But if they are, that raises another question. Where are numbers one, three, and four? And perhaps more importantly, how high do those numbers go?

I checked the comments on the Reddit post. A few people had theories, but nobody seemed to know anything concrete about Bellwether Amusements. Apparently, I wasn't the only one looking for answers.

At this point, I can confirm the existence of two Bellwether machines. One here in Burdale and another in Peril, New York. I realize that's not much to build a conspiracy on, but then there are those fortunes. Why would a novelty machine in a pizza parlor dispense messages that seem to reference the very things I've been investigating for years? The Crown Tree, the strange lights (obviously in reference to The Lightbeam Incident)? Maybe I'm reading too much into a handful of vague sentences. Maybe whoever wrote the fortunes was familiar with local folklore, which would be extremely implausible. Maybe somehow the machine was made specifically for Burdale, and those little references were included as a joke. I could probably accept that, but what I have a harder time explaining is why I can't find a single reliable piece of information about Bellwether Amusements. Who was Bellwether? Was there even a Mr. Bellwether? Or Mrs.? Where were these machines manufactured? Who designed them? And if there are two, how many others are sitting in random establishments around the country? The world?? Five? Ten? A hundred? Do they all dispense strange messages? Do they all feature different characters? Or are these just two forgotten examples of a once popular novelty?

I don't have those answers. But I'm keeping my eyes open. If you've ever encountered a machine bearing the Bellwether Amusements name, I'd be interested in hearing about it. Photographs would be especially appreciated. In the meantime, I've got a few more quarters to spend. And if you happen to stop by Wrong Number Pizza, do me a favor.

Keep your fortune. You never know what might turn up on that little piece of paper.